⚡ “Gas Costs a Fortune… But Relax, It’s ‘Good’ for the Stock Market.”
Saturday Night Live opened this week with a very important message from “President Donald Trump” — as played by James Austin Johnson — that everything is fine, and no one should be worried about the possible domestic consequences of his war in Iran.
The opening sketch is about a family on a roadtrip lamenting the fact that gas is $5 a gallon and that they have to fill their car’s tank.
“Kids, we’re going to have to leave one of you behind,” Ashley Padilla, playing the family’s mother, tells her children.
Before she decides which to abandon to a life of gas fumes and burned coffee, the faux Trump breaks into the scene and sets the record straight.
“You might remember me from such campaign promises as lower gas prices and no more wars. We love to make promises because a promise is just a lie that hasn’t happened yet,” the fake Trump says upon arriving on the scene. “But now gas costs like a million billion dollars a gallon and it’s for the stock market. Let me put it in a way that the Harry Styles fans in the crowd tonight can understand: The stock market is going in One Direction – down.”
Harry Styles was the host and musical guest for the evening.
When fake Trump is asked why the price of gas is so high, he answers “The Epstein Files! Kidding, but possibly not.”
Later in the skit, the false Trump complains about people booing his new buddy, MAGA boxer Jake Paul, prompting Colin Jost’s Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth to emerge from the family’s back seat and asks “did someone say booze?”
A moment later, the false Hegseth explains why he was lingering in the back seat of a random family’s car.
“I’ll tell you the same thing I say when people ask about our plans for Iran: I don’t know,” Jost-as-Hegseth said.
He later parodied the Defense Secretary’s petty press briefing where he complained about the media’s coverage of the war in Iran.
“You babies in the media are completely unpatriotic. They’re using what I do and say to make me look like a fool in there,” he whined. The fake Trump re-enters to say: “Been there! I’ve been there before.”
